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If your wife’s language is quality time, you can wash her car and take out the trash every week, but she will not feel loved until you sit across from her, linger over a cup of coffee, and look into her eyes. ) just to annoy you, or when you think she is late (again!

Assuming wrong motives quickly becomes a bad and dangerous habit, costing you the energy and misery of inner stewing.

However, if you will develop the habit of assuming your spouse’s best intentions, you will be incredibly blessed: you will think more clearly, and you will enjoy your spouse more.

Many years ago, I heard Shirley Dobson say that she prayed and fasted for her marriage.

Her comments resonated with me because I thought that if our spiritual enemy would like to destroy any one marriage, it might be the marriage of Dr.

James and Shirley Dobson, well-known for their efforts to support Biblical marriage.

I suspected that Shirley’s behind-the-scenes prayer and fasting was a critical strength in the Dobson marriage, so I determined to bring that same practice into my own marriage.

(The Dobsons have been married now for almost 55 years, and I am not aware of even a hint of scandal in their marriage.)Fasting sharpens our focus on prayer.

Not everyone is able to fast from food, but all of us can eliminate something from our diet or from our routines, inviting God to grab our spiritual attention in a more intense way.

These are not the foundational principles of marriage.

These tips are one-sentence nuggets of practical advice. Sarcasm is a nasty attitude dressed up in decent words.

They are easy to understand, sometimes difficult to implement, but absolutely transformative. After we take the first step of sarcasm, it is only another step to fully exposed nasty attitudes, revealed now through ugly words.